The Ultimate Celebrity Dick Pics Count Down
We like penises here at A Big Butt And A Smile. I’ve told you how to give a good blow job; how to ride one like a pro and even why I prefer big ones. And then there’s our 20 “Oh My Goodness” celebrity penis pics. Well, now it’s time for the ultimate celebrity dick pics countdown.
We rounded up all the best celebrity dick pics that have been leaked online over the past several years and have put them in a nice, easy to read list for you to peruse in all it’s wonderful penile glory. Be sure to share with your friends so they can joy the big, small and oh my goodness of it all.
Good Gawd why did Usher think this was a good idea. This has to be the worst penis pic to hit the internet. This joint is worse than Diplo’s worse than Jude Law’s worse than this dudes. Like – What. The. Hell. I mean I’ve seen bigger thighs on a chicken.
This is what unsexy looks like.
If you’re thinking of doing a nude selfie (Snapchat) and want to know what not to do, this is it. Don’t do this. Don’t. Do. It. And while you can’t see the whole penis because of the emoji sticker (again WTF???) you know the penis ain’t that interesting as well. Do better Usher. Do better.
44. Jude Law
Poor Jude, no one wants all of their business exposed to the world, especially when you have a reputation for being such a ladies man. We now know it’s his pretty boy good looks that get him the ladies, ’cause I don’t think anyone is impressed with what he’s packing.
No one is really surprised that Steve-O has penis pics out there. The professional prankster is known for his outrageous behavior and exposing himself online would be one of the least crazy things he’s done.
The only real question is what exactly was he thinking when he thought this pose was a good idea? I mean, talk about letting it all hang out. Who do you think took the picture or did he set the camera up himself?
42. Calum Hood
For reasons that still aren’t clear, the 5 Seconds of Summer bassist, shared a video of his penis on Snapchat. Of course, the video went viral and instead of doing the Celebrity Deny It Dance, he readily admitted it was indeed his penis. Alright then. No offense though, Calum, you really could have kept your little man to yourself. Just saying.
It’s a shame, however, dude is black and Jewish, it’s a waste of a perfectly good stereotype that he doesn’t live up to them. I’m sad. Sad I say.
39. Scott Evans
With this being the digital age, however, it was only a matter of time before they ended up online. And well, that time is now. I wonder what his superhero brother has to say about all of this.
38. Yung Berg
Yung Berg producer, supreme douche bag, misogynist and former cast member of Love and Hip Hop Hollywood found all his business put on blast when castmate and former cut buddy exposed his peter-weeter to the world on her social media account.
Seems Hazel E didn’t take to kindly to the way Berg was talking about her and their time together and this was her revenge. Though, in all fairness, if you were dealing with it for as long as they were reportedly dealing, it couldn’t have been all that bad for you.
What say you? Is Yung Berg’s penis an OH MY GOODNESS or an oh my goodness.
37. 50 Cent
50 Cent aka Curtis Jackson is a grade A d*ck so I don’t have a problem taking supreme glee is his little nickel being exposed to the world. Prior to being exposed on his hit Starz series Power, the rapper turned actor had his dime exposed in his biopic Get Rich or Die Trying.
36. Greg Oden
Greg Oden was one of our original 20 celebrity penis pics. He makes the list for the sheer unimpressiveness of what he was showing off. Why he thought it was a good idea to send these pics to anyone is beyond me.
35. Lebron James
It may not be fair to put Lebron James so far down on the list, but I can only work with the optics I was given. And those optics were none to impressive.
The obvious caveats are that it was minding its own business in a pair of compression shorts before it was exposed to the world. But hey, it is what it is. Should a better picture pop on the web, I’d be more than happy to update his place on the list.
34. Jamie Foxx
33. Colin Farrell
This Irish hottie has a not so hot penis pic. Which sorta sucks because we were expecting a bit more from him considering his hotness and his status as a lover of the ladies. Alas it was not to be.
And we can say with a certain level of certainty that it is his hotness not his hungness that’s getting him laid at night. Just goes to show you really can’t judge a book by its really hot cover.
32. Cheyenne Jackson
Cheyenne Jackson seems to have gone a bit boys gone wild at one point. In the process he produced a masturbation video that Fleshbot somehow got a hold of and this penis pic is a screenshot from that.
31. Josh Hutcherson
Peeta’s (little) Peter just may be on the internet. First, it needs to be said that is currently up in the air if this pic is authentic or not.
There’s no knowing whether this is true — all anyone has to go by are pretty closely matching tattoos and Hutcherson has never commented on it.
30. Chris Brown
29. Brett Favre
But hey, when you’ve been a top-flight athlete all your life, you truly have an inflated sense of self. Sterger described him as “He was like that guy at the bar who just could not get the hint.”
28. Andrew Zollner
27. Shemar Moore
The sexy daytime soap and Criminal Minds star seems to like nude beaches. Gay nude beaches at that. Now I won’t be casting any doubt on Shemar Moore’s sexuality, I’ll just keep my comments on his wholly unremarkable penis.
Honestly, it’s hard to say whether it’s a good or bad thing as it seems to be in a resting state. With that said it does look like it would be a chubby one and since we all know I’m a fan of the short thick penis.
26. Draymond Green
But Green’s did and while at first, he trotted out the tried and true “my account was hacked” he soon changed his tune and said it was a mistake that could have happened to anyone.
As far as the penis itself, well, to be honest, I can’t tell if it’s nice or a case of “objects may appear larger than they are.”
25. Nikko Smith
Nikko Smith is a Ninja Turtle looking jacka$$ but he is packing a decent, if uninteresting schlong. If you’re all “Nikko Who?” Don’t feel bad. If I wasn’t a lover of all things ratchet TV I wouldn’t know who he was either.
24. Ray J
Who hasn’t seen Ray J’s penis at this point? Similar to Tommy Lee, Ray J’s penis hit the web thanks to the release of a sex tape. You know the sex tape. Anywho, for such a small guy he sure does have a lot going on.
23. Method Man
I must admit, at half mast, it’s not bad. Not bad at all.
22. Nick Hogan
For those who don’t know The Fappening was the major celebrity cell phone hack that resulted in the release of hundreds (thousands) of nude images of all your favorite celebrities, Jennifer Lawrence and her plethora of nudes being the centerpiece of the hack.
21. Orlando Bloom
Anywho I don’t know that I have much to say about Orlando Bloom’s penis. As far as celebrity penis pics go it’s just meh. Nothing to hate on or celebrate. But if you’re into Bloom, it is a nice gift from the internet gods.
Yay Katy Perry?
20. Santonio Holmes
Santonio Holmes is one of our original 20 celebrity dick pics. His weren’t bad at all, hence the reason he’s so high on our list. He also wins the most – Enthusiastic Penis Pic Taker Award – because you can tell he was all “You gonna like this pic” when he took this one. I ain’t mad Mr. Holmes. I ain’t mad at all. Short thick penises for the win.
19. and 18. Benzino and Yung Joc
Now color me crazy, but placing your man’s penis on the web for the world to see doesn’t exactly strike me as the move of a loving, caring, girlfriend.
But this is Karlie Redd we’re talking about so…
He’s definitely packing a lot more than many on this list who are considerably taller and bigger than he is. Just goes to show that good things can definitely come in small packages.
16. Ben Affleck
Usually, I don’t add film shots of penises to this list, but it’s hard not to when an A-list (A-?) star’s penis is up for viewing.
15. Anthony Weiner
I will say one would think a man with the last name Weiner would know that it would probably be a bad idea to send wiener pics to random women — ESPECIALLY when you’re a United States Congressman and later a mayoral candidate.
Welcome to No. 15 on the Ultimate Penis Pic Countdown Mr. Weiner. We’re glad you
came are here.
14. Justin Bieber
But that is exactly what Justin Bieber did while on vacation on Bora Bora and, of course, there was an unethical, slimy photog ready to take the pics. I can’t lie though, Bieber’s Package is rather impressive. One time for The Biebs.
13. Romeo Miller
Formerly known as Lil Romeo, the rapper and Master P’s son, Romeo Miller has grown into a sexy young man. And all that sexiness was on display when his penis pic was leaked online. I can’t say I’m complaining, but I do wonder how his dad feels about it.
I mean Master P ain’t exactly the best moral compass, but you gotta think no parent would want all his kid’s business out there for all to see. Or not. This is Master P we are talking about after all.
The newly minted reality star and longtime crooner had his penis pics leaked during his stint on Love and Hip Hop Hollywood. The time seemed perfect considering all the penis conversations Omarion and girlfriend Apryl had during the show.
There was talk of its size, it’s lack of circumcision, and the pain it was causing Apryl during sex. Way, WAY too much peen talk, but with the release of this pic we at least got to see what all the fuss was about. And we must say, the fuss was justified.
11. Soulja Boy
Now granted, I concede that it could just be the angle of the shot that has it looking so juicy, but looking at other skinny fellas (I see you Big Sean) then I have to think that his penis his appearing true to size.
Dappy is not a name familiar to too many people on this side of the pond. He was a member of the UK rap group N-Dubz and currently is a solo artist. He was ranked highly on our original penis pic post as well.
His penis pic was quite surprising for its size and just how messy his surroundings were where it was taken. I mean, he couldn’t tidy up a bit before he snapped the pic? I’m just saying.
09. Kanye West
Kanye West wasn’t lying when he said he had a Big Ego. It’s big alright. A Big Ego to match his big ego. Though I think the actual ego still wins out in a size comparison. Mr. West was on our original penis pic article.
He kicked it off actually and was the reason the initial article was written. He’s earned his high spot on this list. Whatever you think of the man, his little (big) man is something to behold.
08. Safaree Samuels
Well, we finally figured out whose anaconda Nikki was rapping about.
Twitter blew up when a sample of a sex tape featuring Safaree and his Anaconda hit the net. Let’s just say everyone was surprised that the goofy Love & Hip Hop star and Nikki Minaj‘s ex was packing such heat.
Though, after a quick Google investigation, no one would have been surprised at all that Safaree was packing all this heat. It was right there in plain sight for all to see. We just weren’t paying attention.
07. Stevie J
He’s charming, can sing, and if you overlook his many, many, many issues, looked like he can beat the brakes off your lady bits.
But with visual proof (no head shot but tatts seems to match up) of what he’s working with, well all confusion has been set aside. Good D will make the smartest woman stupid. And Stevie J. is definitely rocking with that magic stick.
06. Big Sean
With the leak of his penis pic it became clear to the world why Big Sean is called Big Sean. As a member of our original celebrity penis pics article, Big Sean’s pic was probably the most surprising. Skinny guys know they can pack surprises and Big Sean’s monster was definitely a surprise.
And what a pony Ginuwine has.
Look one shouldn’t be suprised that the “Pony” singer is packing. He’s the 90’s version of Big Sean – chocolate and skinny – so there was a good chance that what he had going on in those jeans was going to be a sigh to behold.
Somehow Elgin Baylor Lumpkin’s dick pics were leaked on Tumblr and sent the internet into a panty (boxer) soaked frenzy. I don’t why or who leaked the pics, but I will tell them thank you. The Internet Gods stay working overtime.
04. Tommy Lee
What is there to say? Tommy Lee’s penis is legendary. From the Original Celebrity Sex Tape, and by original I mean one that blew up the market and went totally mainstream, Tommy Lee let the world know he carries a big stick, and it wasn’t a drumstick.
I’ve got nothing bad to say here. The video was made on his honeymoon with Pamela Anderson and later was stolen from their home. These were the days before social media was EVERYTHING and the tape still blew the hell up, it’s just that good.
03. Jeremy Meeks
Jeremy Meeks aka Prison Bae is packing. And I mean “Oh My Gawd What Is That” type packing. If you don’t frequent the more ratchet corners of the internet then you may not be familiar with Mr. Meeks. He’s the hot felon who made headlines because his mugshot looked like something out of GQ Magazine.
Well, Twitter dubbed him #prisonbae, he landed a modeling contract, went to jail and the rest is history. Somewhere along the way, his penis pics ended up on the internet and similar to Stevie J and Sisqo the tatts seem to match up. I mean dude may not be a good guy, but boy he sure is a blessed one.
Can the church say Amen?
02. Prince William
Yeah. I know. But I did say they paparazzi were desperate.
01. Lenny Kravitz
The day Lenny Kravitz’s penis showed up online was like getting Manna From Heaven. Yes, I did just use a religious reference to talk about a man’s penis pic.
There you have it. Our Ultimate Celebrity Dick Pics Countdown. Alright, which of these celebrity dick pics is your favorite? Or your least favorite? Do you agree with our ranking? How would you change it? Sound off in the comments below and let us know what you think.