Racial Stereotypes Hurting Black Women When Dating
While attitudes have softened toward interracial dating and most people don’t view them as abhorrent any longer, there are still plenty of racial stereotypes in place when it comes to the mixing of the races – black and white in particular:
By analyzing Yahoo personals, researchers found that white men prefer Asian and Latino women to African American women as dating partners, and white women favor African American and Latino men over Asian men.
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Asians, African Americans and Latinos were more likely to include white people as possible dates than white people were to include them – suggesting that white people, as the dominant racial group in the U.S., hold the power when it comes to interracial dating.
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“Stereotypical images of masculinity and femininity shape dating choices and continue to be perpetuated in the mass media,” said Feliciano, UCI assistant professor of sociology and Chicano/Latino studies. “The hyper-feminine image of Asian American women contrasts greatly with the image of Asian men, who are often portrayed as asexual.”
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In comparison, the image of the strong African American woman is at odds with idealized notions of submissive and frail women. This may explain why African American women faced high levels of rejection among men, researchers said.
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“Cultural portrayals of African American women in the media continue to stress traits seen as negative, such as bossiness,” Feliciano said.
I’m not surprised by any of the findings of the study. In my online dating experience I’ve found that when I don’t place my race on an ad (say Craigslist) I get a lot of hits, but the moment they find out I’m black they don’t e-mail me back. Even on eHarmony the only serious inquiry I received from a white guy was one who lived in Atlanta and dated more black women than white.
Other experiences of black women I’ve known who’ve done the online dating thing have had the same issues. While attitudes overall may have changed, it is something of a “that’s good for other folks, but not for me,” type of attitude. And with a lot of younger men their families tend to be vehemently opposed to such a union that they succumb to familial pressure regardless of how they may feel for the woman.
Now with that said, I still strongly believe black women have to date the men that are available to them and for many sisters that will mean non-black men of color and white men. BUT…I think the women who will be most successful in interracial/cultural pairings will be those who are culturally aware, are probably more mainstream in their appearance and yes…in shape.
It’s not hopeless by any means, but black women need to be aware and ready for all the issues that come with dating interracially so we can find the love, happiness, and relationships that we all deserve.
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So how do should negro women prepare for interracial relationships when Caucasian men, etc. cannot give them the time of the day or even mutually acknowlege them as women?
“Asians, African Americans and Latinos were more likely to include white people as possible dates than white people were to include them”
Are they sure that’s not just because there are more white people to begin with? I mean, I grew up in a suburb that was like 96% white, so it was probably more likely that I would find 1 white person I wanted to date than one of those 96% would find a non-white person to date, it was like, me and this one asian girl so if you weren’t into either of us that was it for you…
I understand IR dating is hard (you don’t want to accidently hit on a dude in the Klan fror instance) but I’m not sure I agree with
“the women who will be most successful in interracial/cultural pairings will be those who are culturally aware, are probably more mainstream in their appearance”
Actually I might agree with the “culturally aware” part if I knew what that meant, but I gotta say black men hit on me a *lot* less since I started keeping my hair natural, while my rate of non-black hollers seems unchanged… I’m not on the market anymore anyway so I don’t care who’s looking at me, but I do find it very interesting; it’s like if a non-black man would date a black woman at all he doesn’t mind ‘how black’ she is, whereas black men seem to be the ones that get colorstruck, etc. The thing is there’s probably not a whole lot of that kind of non-black men to begin with.
WORD up!!!
To me their really isn’t any preparations for dating Non-Black Men. Every man is different. If you not meeting Non-Black Men, try doing something different. Go to a Wine Tasting Event or a Jazz Concert in the park. Get out of your comfort zone.
Online dating has an array of positives, like being able to get to know the person better before even meeting them. this gives it an edge over other forms of dating.
Married dating site for those looking for a married affair, or in a relationship,
and looking for a marital affair or married dating.
http://www.marriedandlooking.co.za
this article is totally bullshit……………………u fall in love for love not skin color………………u keep preaching this bull shit to sisters and they will all grow old together…………..it is obvious the writer is sleeping with a white boy……………by they way
heard of Arnold and the IMF president.hahaha
*rolls eyes*
Black women exploring ALL their options is not more likely to have them end up old and alone than waiting around for black men to get their act together. It’s about finding love regardless of color for those who are open to that possibility.